The Hunger Games Through Peeta's Eyes
by Rapunzeleyeswinchester
Summary: Did you ever wonder wha Peeta Mellark was thinking through The Hunger Games? Now's your chance to find out! Please review!


I woke up to the smell of baking bread, as usual. As I got ready I felt an unusual sense of dread, though I didn't know why. Then I remembered; it was reaping day. I finished dressing and slowly made my way down to the justice building where hundreds of other boys and girls were waiting to see who the unlucky tributes were that got to participate for District Twelve in the hunger games this year. I prayed that the male tribute wouldn't be me. More importantly, I prayed that the girl tribute wouldn't be her. Katniss Everdeen. I had had a crush on her for as long as I can remember, since we were five I think. But nobody knew that but me and my snooping brother, who was four years older than me. Fortunately, he didn't tell anyone though, not even my other brother who was 2 years older than me. Though, that didn't stop him from teasing me about it when no one was around.

Anyway, I made my way to the middle of the crowd and waited for the announcements to start. All the while thinking to myself _please don't let it be her_ I would rather myself go into the arena than her. Haymitch, a victor of a previous game was supposed to mentor whoever District Twelve's tributes were. But he was usually drunk, so I didn't see how he would be much of a help. He stood on this stage, looking pretty worn out, and he mumbled a few things before taking a nose dive off the stage. Even I had to snicker at that.

Finally, it began. "Ladies first!" says Effie Trinket, the same person who chose the tributes for District Twelve each year. She reaches into the big glass bowl and pulls out a small slip of paper. "Primrose Everdeen!" she reads cheerfully. Everyone falls silent. My mind races a million miles per hour as I process what had just happened. It wasn't Katniss. It was Katniss' little sister. Before I knew what to think, Katniss pushed her way to the front of the crowd, I knew what she was about to do. _No! Don't do it Katniss! _I thought. But it was too late.

"I volunteer! I volunteer as tribute!" Katniss screamed, pushing the peacekeepers off her. She began to slowly walk to the front of the stage. Prim was screaming and crying hysterically and clinging to Katniss' leg. I watched as Gale pulled Prim off of Katniss, while Katniss continued to the front. Her face as emotionless and hard as a rock. I was devastated. I couldn't believe Katniss was going into the arena. I had no doubt she could win, but the thought of her in the Hunger Games, fighting for her life, made my stomach hurt. I didn't even realize that Effie was now choosing the male tribute until she shouted,

"Peeta Mellark!" I froze. Peeta Mellark. That was me. I walked to the front of the crowd, trying to keep my face as emotionless as Katniss, but I could tell I wasn't doing a good job at that. I stood, frozen on the stage as Effie repeated the treaty of treason just as she did every Hunger Games. "You may now shake hands." Effie told us. I looked at Katniss and took her hand in mine. I had no idea why, but I was probably blushing. Scratch that, of course I knew why.

After that, Effie led us into the justice building, while each of us in our own separate room waited for our visitor to come wish us luck before we left. First in was my mother. She didn't seem to upset I was leaving. I didn't care.

"Well, District Twelve might have a winner after all." I was surprised at this comment, until I realized she wasn't talking about me. "She's a fighter that one." I agreed, of course. But it still hurt a little that my mother didn't think I could win. Next was my father. He hugged me and said

"You will win son." I knew I wouldn't, he knew I wouldn't. I didn't see how I could, considering Katniss was my fellow tribute, and there was no way I was going to kill her. Last to visit were my brothers. Connor was two years older than me, and Mitch was four years older than me. As soon as they walked in the door, Connor hugged me. Mitch smiled at me sympathetically. Finally, Mitch said,

"So, I guess we won't be able to persuade you to come home that easily, huh?"

"What?" asked Connor. I knew what Mitch meant. Connor looked at me, "What does he mean?" he asked me. I looked up at Mitch and nodded. Mitch leaned down and whispered something to Connor. I felt myself blushing as Connor's eyes widened. "You like Katniss!" he exclaimed eventually. _Like _didn't seem a strong enough word, but I sighed and nodded. Connor seemed to get over his amazement when he realized my embarrassment, and he put his hand on my shoulder and smiled. "I get it." he said sadly, "Do what you must." I felt so grateful to have such great brothers. And when the realization hit me that I would never see them again, I couldn't help the tears that began streaming down my face. Both my brothers hugged me once more before leaving the room.

Later that day, I stand in my chamber on the train that was taking us to the capitol to be trained. I had my own bed, my own bathroom, a dresser full of clean clothes. Everything I could want. I took a hot shower and dressed in simple pants and a t-shirt. The hour before dinner passed much too quickly, and before I knew it, I was headed out to the dining room. I passed Haymitch on the way there.

"Ooooh," he said, obviously drunk. "If anyone asks, tell them I'm taking a nap." He tumbles into his room, and I move on. Finally, I get to the dining room. No one is there yet, but I take a seat anyway. And when people start coming in, everyone but Katniss so far, I make sure to leave the seat empty next to me.

"Where's Haymitch?" asks Effie, as she and Katniss enter the room.

"Last I saw him, he was taking a nap." I replied, sitting up straighter now that Katniss was here.

"Well, it's been an exhausting day." said Effie, obviously pleased he's not here. Katniss takes the seat next to me as the food begins to be served. There was thick carrot soup, green salad, lamb chops, mashed potatoes, cheeses, fresh fruit salad, and an amazing looking chocolate cake. I decorated the cakes back home at the bakery, so seeing the cake brought back a little homesickness. When we were almost done eating, Effie says

"At least you two have decent table manners! The pair last year ate everything with their hands like a couple of savages! It completely upset my digestion!" After that, I notice that Katniss eats the rest of her meal with her fingers. I secretly smile when I see how upset that makes Effie.

After dinner, we made our way back into another room to watch a recap of the reapings. I watch the people fly by on the screen and I try to imagine us all in the arena trying to kill each other. This makes my stomach hurt, and I try hard to keep my food down when I see a young, dark-skinned girl pop onto the screen. She reminds me of Katniss' little sister, the one she volunteered for. I looked over at Katniss and knew by the expression on her face that she was thinking the same thing. There was no way she would kill that girl. She wouldn't have to. If someone else didn't first, I would, as much as I couldn't bear the thought. I wouldn't put Katniss through that. Then, at last, they show the reaping at District Twelve. Katniss volunteering for Prim. I still can't get over how courageous that was. I look at Katniss to see her face, once again, as emotionless as ever. I turn back to the TV just in time to see Haymitch fly off the end of the stage, and my name being called. I walk quietly to the front. Effie completes the treaty of treason. Unfortunately, the blush on my face is very visible as I shake hands with Katniss. I quickly look around the room, hoping no one noticed.

Finally, the anthem plays and the program is over.

"Your mentor has a lot to learn about presentation. A lot about televised behavior." Says Effie.

I laugh. "He was drunk." I say, "He's drunk every year."

"Every day." says Katniss, smirking. I can't help it when my heart skips a beat.

"Yes," snaps Effie, "How odd you two find it amusing. You know your mentor is your lifeline to the world in these Games. The one who advises you, lines up your sponsors, and dictates the presentation of any gifts. Haymitch can well be the difference between your life and death!" Right on cue, Haymitch stumbles into the room.

"I miss supper?" he groans. Then he vomits all over the carpet.

"So laugh away!" concludes Effie as she skits around the vomit and out of the room.

Katniss and I stand there for a few moments. Staring at Haymitch in his vomiting mess. I realized that what Effie said is true. Haymitch could mean our survival in the games. Well, at least Katniss' survival anyway. And that's what was important to me right now. Katniss looks at me, and without speaking, we both picked up Haymitch by his arms and got him to his feet again.

"I tripped?" he asked, "Smells bad." He says, smearing vomit on his face in an attempt to cover his nose.

"Let's get you back to your room," I say, "Clean you up a bit." We drag him to his room. We can't very well put him on his bed, so instead we put him in the bathtub and turn the shower on him. He doesn't even notice. "It's okay," I say, noticing how disgusted Katniss looked, "I'll take it from here."

"All right," she says, obvious relief on her face. And what was that? Maybe a hint of gratitude? "I can send one of the capitol people to help you," she offers,

"No," I say, "I don't want them" And I truly don't. One reason is because I honestly can't stand any of the people here, except for Katniss of course. And the other reason is because I'm trying to do her a favor. I don't need her to think I can't do this on my own. She nods and leaves the room. I carefully strip Haymitch and pump a whole bottle of soap onto him. I press a sponge into his hand and try and bring him out of his trance. _That _part he can do on his own.

Finally, he comes to and closes the shower curtain to bathe. He thanks me through the curtain, and I leave. When I finally get back to my room, I crash almost immediately.

I don't wake up again until I hear Effie outside my door squeaking "It's going to be a big, big day!" I groan and pull on the same clothes from yesterday before going back out to the dining room. Haymitch is already there, but Katniss must still be asleep. Haymitch grins when he sees me.

"Ah, Peeta." He says,

"Um, yes?" I say cautiously as I take a seat across from him.

"So, tell me about Katniss." He says expectantly. I instinctively blush, though I don't know what he's talking about. Haymitch leans in and says in a hushed tone, "I know you have a crush on her." Now I'm _really _blushing.

"I- I do not!" I stammer, Haymitch snorts.

"Of course, and I don't drink!" he says sarcastically. I slump down in my chair and try to hide my embarrassment as he goes on. "It's a little obvious Peeta," he continues, "You are always staring at her, after all." I mentally kick myself for not being more careful with that.

"So what if I do?" I ask, Haymitch grins,

"I was hoping you'd ask that." _Oh great. _"You do want to keep her alive in the arena, am I right?" he asks me. I figure there's no getting around it, so I say,

"Well… yes. That was my plan." Haymitch considers this for a moment, before saying,

"Well, then. I think I can help you with that." I sit up in my chair, urging him to continue. "Well, what you two need are sponsors. And to get sponsors, you'll have to be memorable in your interview. What could be more memorable than a boy crushing on his fellow tribute?" He pauses, waiting for me to get it. When I do, my face turns pale.

"You don't mean-" I begin, but Haymitch cuts me off,

"You will announce your little crush during your interview." He concludes with a smile. I blink. He can't be serious.

"Are you crazy?" I shout at him, "I can't even tell _her _let alone all of Panem!"

"Well then, this is the perfect chance to tell her!" he answers cheerfully. I feel like passing out. I can't possibly tell the world how I feel about Katniss. Katniss! What will she think?

"Oooooh noooo…." I moan. Suddenly, Katniss is walking through the door, and I almost fall out of my chair jerking upright. Haymitch chuckles at my reaction, and I mouth to him "Shut up!" hoping that Katniss doesn't notice me blushing.

"Sit down! Sit down!" Haymitch says to her, still chuckling, as he waves her to the seat right next to me. I scowl at him, and quickly calm my heartbeat as she takes a seat next to me. All I am hoping right now, is that she didn't hear a word of our conversation.

Waiters serve us heaping plates of eggs, ham, fried potatoes, and fruit. I see orange juice, coffee, and hot chocolate. My first time having hot chocolate was only yesterday. I see Katniss eyeing the hot chocolate, not sure what to make of it.

"They call it hot chocolate," I say, "It's good." Apparently she trusts me because she drains the whole cup before she even takes a bite of her food. I smile to myself. After we're done stuffing ourselves, Haymitch sits back in his chair and chugs dark red liquid from a bottle.

"So, you're supposed to give us advice?" Katniss asks Haymitch.

"Here's some advice stay alive!" He shouts back, before bursting into laughter. Katniss looks at me, and I remember that he is her chance of survival.

"That's very funny." I say. Suddenly, I'm lunging towards Haymitch, knocking the bottle out of his hands and sending the drink across the floor. "Only, not to us." Haymitch glares at me, then punches me in the jaw, sending me flying backwards. I fight to keep myself from crying in front of Katniss. I took a beating for her once, I'll do it again.

Haymitch turns to grab his alcohol, but Katniss throws her knife, and it lands right between his hands and his liquor, barely missing his fingers. I momentarily forget about Haymitch, as I'm so impressed with Katniss' throwing skills. Not to mention, she stood up for me, I think. Which I never thought she'd do. Haymitch stares at Katniss and I.

"Well, what's this?" he asks, "Did I actually get a pair of fighters this year?" I slowly stand up and grab a handful of ice from the fruit bowl, putting it on my jaw. "No," says Haymitch, "Let the bruise show. The audience will think you've mixed it up with another tribute before you've even made it to the arena."

"That's against the rules," I say, I'm also thinking, _The only tribute I've seen is Katniss, and in no world would I be fighting with her!_

"Only if you're caught," continues Haymitch, "The bruise will say you've fought, they didn't catch you, even better." Haymitch looks at Katniss, "Can you hit anything with that knife besides a table?"

Of course she can. I eat her catches almost every day for dinner, as my father trades bread for them. But she considers this before picking up the knife. She throws the knife across the room, making the knife lodge in the seam between two panels. Wow. She really _is _good.

"Stand over here. Both of you," says Haymitch, motioning us to the center of the room. Haymitch stares us down, examining us. "Well, you're not entirely hopeless. Seem fit. And once the stylists get ahold of you, you'll be attractive enough," he decides finally. We don't argue with him. Both Katniss and I know that looking good would make it much easier to get sponsors. Not that Katniss didn't already look good. "Alright, I'll make a deal with you. You don't interfere with my drinking, and I'll stay sober enough to help you," says Haymitch, "But you have to do exactly what I say."

I figure that's the best deal we're going to get from Haymitch, and I say, "Fine,"

"So help us," says Katniss, "When we get in the arena, what's the best strategy at the Cornucopia for someone-"

"One thing at a time," interrupts Haymitch, "In a few minutes, we'll be pulling into the station. You'll be put into the hands of your stylists. You're not going to like what they do to you. But no matter what it is, don't resist," says Haymitch.

"But-" Says Katniss.

"No buts. Don't resist." says Haymitch. He takes his bottle of alcohol from the table and leaves the car.

When he shuts the door, I realize how dark it is outside. We must be passing under a tunnel. Katniss and I are standing alone in the car. I can't help but be nervous. It's kind of pathetic actually.

When the train comes out into the light, Katniss and I run to the window to see the Capitol. It's amazing, really. I mean, everything is so big and shiny and somewhat ridiculous looking actually. The insane costumes people were wearing. Then I realize, they're not costumes. That's just what they wear every day! I begin to smile and wave at the people outside. They wave back. I turn to look at Katniss and realize she's staring at me, I shrug.

"Who knows?" I say, "One of them might be rich." She raises her eyebrows at me, and seems to be thinking. I wonder if she knows I'm just trying to impress her. Probably not. And then I realized something, of course she wouldn't think that because she thinks I'm going to try and kill her. And she's going to try and kill me. Right? She's not going to try and protect me like I am trying to protect her. And I didn't think she would. But I almost forgot she would be trying to kill me just like everybody else.

As soon as we pull into the station, we are whisked off to our stylists.

"Hello! I'm your stylist! I'm Portia!" she says, a little too cheerfully, staring down on me with her heavily-hair-sprayed hair hanging around her face . She had so much makeup on, I was afraid to know what she so badly wanted to cover up beneath! Then she studied me for a moment. "Yes, we have a lot of work to do."

She had me strip down, and I was hoping I could keep my underwear on, but I wasn't that lucky. I lay, naked and uncomfortable on a table while the stylists examine my body. It was bad enough I was laying here completely nude, but my embarrassment was quickly replaced by pain as they starting yanking hair off my body. I grit my teeth and grabbed the sides of the table as they wax the most uncomfortable of areas. As soon as that was over, I was allowed to put my robe on. I was almost calm now, until Portia said slyly,

"Peeta, how do you feel about fire?"

I gulp. "Um… I don't know, why?" Soon, I am dressed in a black unitard, tall black boots, a head dress, and a long fiery cape of yellow and orange and red. But just when I think the outfit can't get any more complicated, Portia announces that I will be on fire. I almost choke, "On… fire?" I say, unbelieving.

"Oh yes!" exclaims Portia, "But don't worry, only synthetic! Made to satisfy the wearers, not burn them to the ground!" she laughs. I'm still not so sure.

When we make it back to the room that the others are waiting in, I see that Katniss is wearing the same outfit. They are the exact same, except for the fact that I feel like an idiot and she looks absolutely stunning. I really wish I didn't blush so much.

Everyone put us in position and starts murmuring amongst themselves as Katniss and I wait to be sent off in the chariot for the opening ceremony.

"What do you think?" Katniss whispers to me, "About the fire?"

"I'll rip off your cape if you rip off mine," I tell her,

"Deal." She answers, and I'm happy that she agreed with me. "I know we told Haymitch we'd do exactly what they say, but I don't think he considered this angle." She says.

"Where is Haymitch anyway? Isn't he supposed to be protecting us from this sort of thing?" I ask her,

"With all that alcohol in him, it's probably not advisable to have him around an open flame," says Katniss. We both crack up, and I realize that this is the first time I've heard her laugh. And I'm so glad It's her laughing with me, and not at me.

Suddenly, the music starts and the chariot begins to roll. I know the other tributes are riding in front of us, but I can't bring myself to look at anything else besides Katniss right now. She really does look good in that costume.

Suddenly, Cinna, Katniss' stylist, appears with a torch and sets our capes on fire before we can protest. I brace myself to rip the cape off Katniss' shoulders, but stop when I realize we're not burning. Actually, it doesn't do much more than tickle a little. Cinna then lights our head dresses, and sighs in relief when they work. Cinna puts his hand under Katniss' chin and tilts her head up.

"Remember, heads high. Smiles. They're going to love you!" Cinna jumps off the chariot and shouts something to us as we ride away.

"What's he saying?" Katniss asks me, looking up into my eyes. I once again realize how amazing she looks, and even though I have no clue what Cinna was saying, I say to her,

"I think he wants us to hold hands." I take her hand in mine and thank the heavens she didn't protest. Now _that _would've been embarrassing.

We ride through the streets of the Capitol, people screaming our names and "District Twelve!" and throwing flowers at us. Katniss catches on and blows a kiss to whomever threw it to her. People are screaming at her. She really is good at this. I smile and try to make myself look presentable, but that's a little hard to do standing next to Katniss. Of course, I couldn't possibly mind.

Suddenly, I realize how tightly Katniss is squeezing my hand. She must notice too, because she lightens her grip on me.

"No, don't let go of me," I say, and re-grip her hand tightly. Then I realize how pathetic I must sound, so I add, "Please. I might fall out of this thing."

"Okay," she says, and remains locked onto my hand. For this, I am very thankful. Because… well… you know.

Finally, when our ride through the Capitol is over, Cinna extinguishes us. Then I realize that Katniss is still glued to my hand. She quickly pulls away from me and begins to massage her hand. I do the same.

"Thanks for keeping hold of me. I was getting a little shaky there," I say to her,

"It didn't show," she answers, "I'm sure no one noticed,"

"I'm sure they didn't notice anything but you. You should wear flames more often, they suit you." I smile at her shyly, and I'm sure I'm blushing. I can't even believe I just said that. I didn't really expect her to say anything, really. But what she does next surprises me more than anything else. She stands on her tip toes and kisses me. Right on the bruise where Haymitch punched me.

Butterflies explode in my stomach. I can't believe this just happened. I try and stop the giddy smile that's starting to spread across my face, but I know my blushing is unfixable. And I'm certain I'm blushing red as a beet right now. She looks at me with eyes so hard, that I know she only did it because she thinks I'm trying to kill her. But if she only knew how wrong she was.

Katniss, and Effie and I are riding up the elevator to the training center. In the training center, there's a tower for us and Haymitch and our stylists to live in until the actual games have started. Effie has been talking it up all day, trying to get us sponsors and what not. Suddenly she says,

"I've been very mysterious, though, because, of course, Haymitch hasn't told me your strategies. But I've done my best with what I had to work with. How Katniss sacrificed herself for her sister. How you've both successfully struggled to overcome the barbarism of your district."

Barbarism? Was she crazy? Oh right, I forgot, she was crazy.

"Everyone has their reservations, naturally. You being from the coal district. But I said, and this was very clever of me, I said, 'Well, if you put enough pressure on coal it turns to pearls!'" Effie exclaims. Pearls? Coal does not turn to pearls no matter what you do to it. But we congratulate her anyway at her, so called, "cleverness". "Unfortunately, I can't seal the sponsor deals for you. " Effie continues glumly, "Only Haymitch can do that. But don't worry, I'll get him to the table at gunpoint if necessary." I had to smile at that thought.

The quarters we will be living in are bigger than any building I've ever seen back in District Twelve. The rooms are a mix between plush comfort and electronic gadgets. There are so many buttons I can't even begin to image what they all do. The shower has so many controls, I don't even get hot water back home so I'm very surprised when jets spray from all directions with steaming water. Washing my hair, arms, legs, and feet. Scented soaps begin writhing themselves through my tangled blond locks, and some unknown force suds my head in the stuff.

When I'm completely clean, I unwillingly step out of the shower and almost immediately slip on the slick tiles. When I put my hand on something on the wall to slow my fall, it blows out a warm current, thoroughly drying my hair and body, and combing my hair perfectly. Wow. This place is really weird. But also very cool.

I dress myself in simple pants and a t-shirt again before following Effie back out to a dining room for dinner. When Katniss comes in, we take a seat at the table.

A young man dressed in white serves us some wine. I've only had wine once, and I don't like it at all, so I turn it down. Katniss however looks it over cautiously before deciding to take a sip. She makes a face and I secretly chuckle to myself at her reaction.

Soon, Haymitch comes in looking more presentable than I've ever seen him. He doesn't turn down the wine, though he does look sober enough to have a decent conversation about our strategies in the games.

Finally dinner is served. Mushroom soup, bitter greens with tiny tomatoes, ultra-thin-sliced roast beef, and noodles in a green sauce, melty cheese and sweet blue grapes. Soon, a tall girl in white clothing sets an amazing looking cake on the table. Then she lights it on fire. Nothing seems to be enough for these Capitol people. They can't just have a delicious cake, they have to light it on fire too.

"What makes it burn? Is it alcohol?" ask Katniss looking up at the girl, " That's the last thing I wa- oh! I know you!" I am utterly shocked. The girl shakes her head quickly and scurries out of the room.

Katniss gets over her amazement and looks back to us. The adults are staring at her like she dropped from the moon.

"Don't be ridiculous Katniss. How could you possible know an Avox?" exclaims Effie, "The very thought." Katniss looks embarrassed,

"Um, what's an Avox?" she asks cautiously.

"Someone who committed a crime. They cut her tongue so she can't speak," answers Haymitch, "She's probably a traitor of some sort. Not likely you'd know her."

"And even if you did, you're not to speak to one of them unless it's to give an order," continues Effie. "Of course, you don't really know her." But something in Katniss' face tells me she does know her.

"No, I guess not, I just-"she stammers. I snap my fingers, trying to save her from an awkward silence.

"Delly Cartwright. That's who it is. I kept thinking she looked familiar as well. Then I realized she's a dead ringer for Delly." I honestly had no idea what I was saying. Delly, one of my closest friends looks nothing like that girl. But I just wanted to take their attention off of Katniss. Haymitch eyes me suspiciously. I think he suspects that's not true, but he lets it pass.

"Of course, that's who I was thinking of. It must be the hair," says Katniss.

"Something about the eyes, too," I reply, but I think I only said that because I was staring at Katniss' eyes.

"Oh, well. If that's all it is," says Cinna, "And yes, the cake has spirits, but all the alcohol has burned off. I ordered it specially in honor of your fiery debut."

When we're done eating the cake, we go into a room to re-watch the opening ceremonies on TV.

"Who's idea was the hand holding?" asks Haymitch.

"Cinna's," answers Portia.

"Just the perfect touch of rebellion." says Haymitch, "Very nice." I watch the TV and realize with a shock that I'm staring at Katniss the entire time. I blush and look around the room, hoping once again that no one notices. Haymitch raises his eyebrows and smiles knowingly at me, but he doesn't say a word.

"Tomorrow morning is the first training session. Meet me for breakfast and I'll tell you exactly how I want you to play it," says Haymitch when the program is over. "Now go get some sleep while the grow-ups talk."

Katniss and I walk towards our rooms. When we get to her door, I lean against the door frame, hoping she'll look at me.

"So, Delly Cartwright. Imagine finding her lookalike here." Wow. Real smooth. I sound like an idiot, and probably look like one too, but Katniss looks up at me and she seems like she wants to tell me. "Have you been to the roof yet?" I ask her, she shakes her head. "Cinna showed me. You can practically see the whole city. The wind's a bit loud, though." I'm sure I still sound pretty stupid.

But she picks up on my hint and says, "Can we just go up?"

"Sure, come on." I say smiling at her. She follows me up to the roof.

The view from the roof is quite grand. You really can see every inch of their whole, makeup-covered city. Katniss and I walk to the edge of the roof and take a seat facing each other.

"I asked Cinna why they let us up here." I say, hoping to start the conversation. "Weren't they worried that some of the tributes might decide to jump right over the side?"

"What'd he say?" she asks.

"You can't," I say, putting my hand over the side. She watches as some electric force throws my hand back. "Some kind of electric field throws you back on the roof." I explain.

"Always worried about our safety," says Katniss sarcastically. "Do you think they're watching us now?"

"Maybe," I say, "Come see the garden." I lead her to the other side of the dome where there's garden filled with potted trees and flower beds. Hundreds of wind chimes hung from the branches. No one would hear us here. I look at Katniss, wondering if she'll tell me how she knows the Avox. Katniss studies a blossom.

"We were hunting in the woods one day. Hidden, waiting for game," she whispers finally.

"You and your father?" I whisper back.

"No, my friend Gale." Of course. She's always with Gale. I wouldn't mind, because they are best friends after all. But Everyone knows that Gale has a crush on Katniss. Everyone but Katniss, that is.

Katniss tells me how suddenly all of the birds stopped singing. How only one was left singing, making a warning of a sort. She tells me how the boy and girl appeared. Their clothes were tattered and they looked like they hadn't slept or ate in a week. They were running from something.

"The hovercraft appeared out of nowhere." She says, remembering the thought. Katniss tells me how they picked the girl up, right off the ground and into the hovercraft. They shot a spear through the boys belly and started to haul him up.

"Did they see you?" I ask her.

"I don't know. We were under a shelf of rock." She answers. Though she says she doesn't know, I can tell by the guilty look on her face that they did see her. Katniss feels guilty about not saving them, and now seeing the girl here has just made those thoughts fresh in her minds.

I look at Katniss sympathetically. I'm secretly glad she didn't do anything to help those kids, because if she had, the hovercraft probably would've caught her too. If Katniss was taken, I don't know what I would've done. I do know one thing though; if Katniss hadn't been there to volunteer for her sister, I would've been trying just as hard as I am now to keep Prim alive, instead of Katniss.

I look at Katniss and realize she's shivering.

"You're shivering," I say, taking off my coat and draping it around her shoulders. She hesitates, then lets me button the collar around her neck. I'm glad she didn't protest. I've always wanted to do that.

"They were from here?" I ask, and she nods.

"They had that Capitol look about them. The boy and the girl."

"Where do you suppose they were going?" I ask.

"I don't know that, or why they would leave here." She says.

"I'd leave here," I blurt out, then I realize how loud I was and I look around nervously. "I'd go home now if they let me. But you have to admit, the food's prime." Phew. Nice save.

"It's getting chilly. We better go in," I say. I do like being alone with Katniss, but I'm afraid I'll start saying some really stupid stuff if I get too nervous. Hey, it happens to me a lot. "Your friend Gale. He's the one who took your sister away at the reaping?" I ask her, not knowing why I would want to talk about Gale. But I'm curious to know what she has to say about him.

"Yes. You know him?" she replies.

"Not really. I hear the girls talk about him a lot. I thought he was your cousin or something. You favor each other," It's true, I do hear girls saying how cute Gale is. They do favor each other, but I knew it was too much hope to think they could be related.

"No, we're not related," she says plainly. I nod, trying not to let any emotion cross my face.

"Did he come to say goodbye to you?" I still didn't really get what I wanted out of Katniss. I wanted to see how she thought of Gale. As a friend? Or….. more.

"Yes, so did your father. He brought me cookies." she says. I raise my eyebrows. He did? I hope he didn't say anything embarrassing. Mitch didn't tell him anything, right?

"Really? Well, he likes you and your sister. I think he wishes he had a daughter instead of a houseful of boys." He likes you and your sister. I hope she didn't translate that to; I like you. "He knew your mother when they were kids," I say. Somewhat true. Actually, he was in love with her mother. He wanted to marry her. I guess liking the Everdeens kind of runs in the family.

"Oh, yes. She grew up in town," says Katniss. Finally, we get to her door. She hands me back my jacket.

"See you in the morning then." She says, not meeting my eyes.

"See you," I say, and I walk down the hall back to my own room.

I wonder if she has the slightest idea of how I feel about her. She must've seen me staring at her in school. According to Haymitch, I'm not great at hiding that.

I go to my bed after washing up and putting on a clean t-shirt and shorts. I slip inside the covers and just lay there for a while, thinking, before I finally fall asleep.

The next morning I wake up to find that someone has already set out an outfit for me. Tight black pants, a long-sleeved burgundy tunic, and leather shoes. I make my way out of my bedroom, and meet Haymitch as I'm walking to the dining room.

"Haymitch," I say.

"Peeta," he answers, smiling at me mysteriously.

As we walk into the room for breakfast, I see Katniss is already there. I smile because I almost forgot I got to spend every morning with her. Even if it is planning ways to kill other tributes, including each other. I glance at Haymitch, still smiling, and realize he's trying to keep from laughing.

"What?" I demand.

"Oh, nothing." he snickers, "I just forgot." I scowl at him.

I fill my plate with breakfast delicacies and take a seat next to Katniss. I realize she's ripping apart her bread and dipping the chunks in her hot chocolate, just as I was doing yesterday on the train. So, she was paying attention to me after all.

Then I realize, Katniss is wearing the exact same outfit I am. Of course, I don't mind at all. But I do wonder why they set out the same outfits for us. Why they made us hold hands. What angle are they trying to play? Then I remember my conversation with Haymitch, and find myself blushing again. I really need to stop doing that.

Finally, after we've eaten all we stuff into ourselves, Haymitch sits forward.

"So, let's get down to business. Training. First off. If you like, I'll coach you separately. Decide now."

"Why would you coach us separately?" asks Katniss. I almost blush, but then I realize how pathetic that is and I try to stop myself.

"Say if you had a secret skill you might not want the other to know about," says Haymitch. Katniss and I exchange a look.

"I don't have any secret skills," I say truthfully. "And I already know what yours is, right? I mean, I've eaten enough of your squirrels." Katniss looks a little surprised at the squirrel comment.

"You can coach us together," says Katniss, and I nod.

"All right, so give me some idea of what you can do," says Haymitch.

"I can't do anything," I say, "Unless you count baking bread."

"Sorry, I don't. Katniss. I already know you're handy with a knife," says Haymitch.

"Not really. But I can hunt," she says, "With a bow and arrow."

"And you're good?" asks Haymitch.

"She's excellent," I blurt out, "My father buys her squirrels. He always comments on how the arrows never pierce the body. She hits every one in the eye. It's the same with the rabbits she sells the butcher. She can even bring down deer." I say shyly. I can see that it surprises Katniss how much I know about her hunting. But I guess if you've been crushing on someone for over ten years, you know things.

"What are you doing?" she asks cautiously.

"What are you doing? If he's going to help you, he has to know what you're capable of. Don't underrate yourself," I answer calmly.

"What about you? I've seen you in the market. You can lift hundred-pound bags of flour," she snaps back at me. "Tell him that. That's not nothing." I'm a little surprised when she says this. She's seen me in the market? I didn't know she ever paid any attention to me.

"Yes, and I'm sure the arena will be full of bags of flour for me to chuck at people. It's not like being able to use a weapon. You know it isn't," I shoot back at her, trying to sound angry, but I'm slightly pleased that she's noticed these things about me.

"He can wrestle," she continues to Haymitch, "He came in second in our school competition last year, only after his brother."

"What use is that? How many times have you seen someone wrestle someone to death?" I say, though the thought of me wrestling another tribute to death almost makes me laugh.

"There's always hand-to-hand combat. All you need is to come up with a knife, and you'll at least stand a chance. If I get jumped, I'm dead!"

"But you won't! You'll be living up in some tree eating raw squirrels and picking off people with arrows. You know what my mother said to me when she came to say good-bye, as if to cheer me up, she says maybe District Twelve will finally have a winner. Then I realized, she didn't mean me, she meant you!" I shout without thinking.

"Oh, she meant you," says Katniss, not believing me.

"She said, 'She's a survivor, that one.' _She _is," I answer. I see a change in Katniss' face and I know she believes me.

Suddenly, Katniss looks me right in the eyes and says quietly, "But only because someone helped me." I look down at the roll in her hands and know she's thinking of the same day I am. The day I took a beating from my mother to give Katniss the bread I burnt on purpose. The day I saw her so frail looking, starving and sitting in the rain. I couldn't bear to see her like that, so I purposely burnt two loaves of bread and gave them to her.

I don't want her to see how much that day affected me, so I simply shrug and say, "People will help you in the arena. They'll be tripping over each other to sponsor you."

"No more than you," she says defiantly. I roll my eyes at Haymitch.

"She has no idea. The effect she can have." I trace my fingernail along the wooden table. I don't look at her, but I wonder if she knows what I mean by that. Haymitch certainly does.

"Well." Says Haymitch, "Well, well, well. Katniss, there's no guarantee there'll be bows and arrows in the arena, but during your private session with the Gamemakers, show them what you can do. Until then, stay clear of archery. Are you any good at trapping?"

"I know a few basic snares," she mutters. I roll my eyes again, because I know she's great at trapping.

"That may be significant in terms of food," says Haymitch, "And, Peeta, she's right, never underestimate strength in the arena. Very often, physical power tilts the advantage to a player. In the Training Center, they will have weights, but don't reveal how much you can lift in front of the other tributes. The plan's the same for both of you. You go to group training. Spend the time trying to learn something you don't know. Throw a spear. Swing a mace. Learn to tie a decent knot. Save showing what you're best at until your private sessions. Are we clear?" says Haymitch, and we nod.

"One last thing. In public, I want you by each other's side every minute," Haymitch continues. Katniss starts to object, and I do the same. But secretly, that sounds like a fine plan to me. "Every minute!" Haymitch declares, slamming his hand down on the table. "It's not open for discussion! You agreed to do as I said! You will be together. You will appear amiable to each other. Now get out. Meet Effie at the elevator at ten for training."

Katniss scowls, and storms out of the room. She slams her door, obviously wanting me to hear.

"Great," I mumble to Haymitch, "Now she hates me even more than before." Haymitch coughs and takes a drink from his flask.

"She'll see." he grumbles. "She'll realize she wants you sooner or later." I roll my eyes at him and stalk back to my room.

_She has no idea. The effect she can have. _Does she know that was meant to be a compliment? That I meant, she has no idea the effect she has on me? I said so much about her hunting that she probably thinks I'm a stalker. Then I remember what she said about me. She's noticed my wrestling. She's seen me carrying flour. Heck, she even knows that the flour was one hundred pounds. Maybe she hasn't been ignoring me after all.

I splash water on my face and prepare for a day of training with twenty two other kids who want to kill me. Twenty three if you count Katniss. When I meet Effie and Katniss at the elevator, I notice that Katniss is biting her nails. She notices too, and stops immediately.

When we step out of the elevator, we walk straight into a huge gymnasium filled with all sorts of weapon and obstacles. The rest of the tributes are standing in a circle in the middle of the room, each with a cloth pinned to their shirt with their district number on it. As I look around the room, I notice that Katniss and I are the only ones dressed alike. Great. Now we stand out even more.

When Katniss and I join the circle, the head trainer, Atala, explains our training schedule. We can go to whatever stations we want, and experts in each will stay in their station. There are stations that teach survival skills, and stations that teach fighting techniques.

As I look at the other tributes around us, I realize how huge most of them are. I glance at Katniss and I can tell she's thinking. I can't help but notice how much smaller she is than most of the other tributes. Though, she's certainly stronger. I know she has a chance to win. I want to reassure her of that, but I don't know how. Instead, I nudge her arm, and she jumps.

"Where would you like to start?" I ask her.

"Suppose we tie some knots," she says.

"Right you are," I answer. We make our way to an empty station. I guess tying knots isn't that popular. I notice that Katniss wasn't telling the full truth about snares, because she's excellent at trapping.

After an hour of not tying and snare making, we make our way to the camouflage station. Now here's what I'm good at. I cover my arms in designs resembling leaves and vines and bark. The trainer looks impressed.

"I do the cakes," I say to Katniss stupidly.

"The cakes?" she asks, clearly not paying much attention, "What cakes?"

"At home. The iced ones, for the bakery," I tell her. She looks at the designs on my arm.

"It's lovely." She admits, "If only you could frost someone to death,"

"Don't be so superior. You never can tell what you'll find in the arena. Say it's actually a gigantic cake-"I continue like an idiot.

"Say we move on." Katniss interrupts.

So, Katniss and I spend the next few days maneuvering from station to station. Staying together like Haymitch ordered. Besides our breakfast and dinner, which we eat in our quarters like usual, all the tributes eat lunch together in one big room. Of course, Katniss and I always sit with each other, under Haymitch's rules.

One day I'm trying to think of something to talk about, since it's a little awkward just sitting with her in silence. I pick up a basket full of rolls and dump them on the table.

"See this one?" I say, pointing to fish-shaped loaf tinted seaweed green. "This one's from District Four." I continue lamely explaining where each bread roll comes from. Funny, I'm never speechless. I always know what to say, except when I'm around Katniss. Most of the time, before the reaping and all, I was too nervous to say anything to her at all. Actually, I had never even talked to her before the reaping. So, in a way, it was kind of good luck that I was chosen after her. Except for the fact that one of us, if not both of us, are going to die.

"And there you have it," I say when I'm done explaining about bread.

"You certainly know a lot," says Katniss.

"Only about bread," I answer, and I wonder if she really meant what she said. "Okay, now laugh as if I've said something funny." Katniss laughs halfheartedly, but it still gives me butterflies. I notice that people are staring at us, and now I'm hoping I'm not blushing.

"All right, I'll keep smiling pleasantly and you talk," I tell her. And it won't be that hard to do.

"Did I ever tell you about the time I was chased by a bear?" I almost have to laugh at that. Of course she hasn't told me. She never even talked to before the reaping.

"No, but it sounds fascinating," I say truthfully.

Katniss tells me how she tried to take some honey from the woods, and how a black bear wanted the same hive. I laugh and ask questions. I'm enjoying talking with Katniss, even if it is mostly because of Haymitch.

The next day, while we're at the spear throwing station, I notice the small girl that looks like Prim standing behind us.

"I think we have a shadow." I whisper to Katniss. Katniss turns to see the girl. When I see the pain in Katniss' eyes, I know she's thinking of her sister.

"I think her name's Rue," I say softly.

Katniss bites her lip and says, a little harshly, "What can we do about it?"

"Nothing to do," I answer calmly. I know she's not really mad at me. "Just making conversation."

Every breakfast and dinner, Haymitch and Effie question our every moment of every day. Where did we go? Who was watching us? What did we do?

As Katniss and I head back to our rooms, I say, "Somebody ought to get Haymitch a drink." Katniss snorts, and I smile. Then she looks pained.

"Don't. Don't let's pretend when there's no one around." My heart sinks.

"All right, Katniss," I say, hoping to sound tired and not upset about the fact.

The next day, we're sitting in a room waiting for our private sessions with the Gamemakers. Katniss and I, being from the last district, are the last ones to be called in. It's a little awkward sitting with Katniss now. Now that I know for sure that she's just pretending to be friendly.

Finally, they call my name.

"Remember what Haymitch said about being sure to throw the weights." Katniss blurts out. I smile to myself.

"Thanks. I will. You… shoot straight." I stammer. Wow, I just keep getting worse and worse at this. I go into the private session room, leaving Katniss alone. I don't really do much. All the Gamemakers are just sitting there. Not paying much attention to me. They're drinking and eating and singing some kind of a song with each other. I just throw some weights around, lift some heavy stuff. Then after about fifteen minutes, I am dismissed.

When the private sessions are over, I'm sitting back at our quarters. Katniss still hasn't come out of her private session yet. Suddenly, I hear run into her room and slam the door. I quietly tiptoe to her room when no one's looking, and press my ear up to the door. I can't believe what I'm hearing. Is Katniss crying? What could have happened? I feel terrible. I wonder if there's anything I can do to help her.

I quickly scurry back to the dining room as Haymitch and Effie come down the hallway. I can hear them banging on her door, pleading with her to come out. Finally, she does. Haymitch and Effie are sitting at the table with me as the food is about to be served. Katniss sits down next to me. Looking down at the table. She eats her fish soup slowly.

Finally, Katniss looks up and meets my eyes. Her face is still red. I raise my eyebrows, hoping she might tell me what happened. She just shakes her head weakly. As they're serving the main course, Haymitch stops suddenly and says,

"Okay, enough small talk, just how bad were you today?"

I quickly answer, trying to save Katniss from an awkward moment when she clearly doesn't want to discuss it yet. "I don't know that it mattered." I say, "By the time I showed up, no one even bothered to look at me. They were singing some kind of drinking song, I think. So, I threw around some heavy objects until they told me I could go." Katniss face lightens just a little.

"And you Sweetheart?" asks Haymitch, looking at Katniss. I can tell Katniss doesn't like being called Sweetheart.

"I shot an arrow at the Gamemakers." She says. Everyone stops eating and stares at her.

"You what?" exclaims Effie, choking on her roll.

"I shot an arrow at them. Not exactly at them. In their direction. It's like Peeta said, I was shooting and they were ignoring me and I just… I just lost my head, so I shot an apple out of their stupid roast pig's mouth!" she answers defiantly. I am actually quite impressed. But I hope she doesn't get into too much trouble.

"And what did they say?" asks Cinna slowly.

"Nothing. Or I don't know. I walked out after that." Katniss says.

"Without being dismissed?" gasps Effie.

"I dismissed myself," she answers calmly.

"Well, that's that," says Haymitch, buttering a roll.

"Do you think they'll arrest me?" asks Katniss.

"Doubt it. Be a pain to replace you at this stage," Haymitch answers, stuffing the roll in his mouth.

"What about my family?" says Katniss, her voice is trembling. "Will they punish them?" I realize the only things she's really worried about are her mother and Prim.

"Don't think so. Wouldn't make much sense. See, they'd have to reveal what happened in the training center for it to have any worthwhile effect on the population. People would need to know what you did. But they can't since it's secret, so it'd be a waste of effort," says Haymitch. "More likely they'll make your life hell in the arena."

"Well, they've already promised to do that to us anyway," I jump in, trying to make Katniss feel better.

"Very true," says Haymitch. Katniss looks a lot better. Haymitch begins to eat a pork chop with his fingers, and Effie glares at him disapprovingly.

"What were their faces like?" he says chuckling. Surprisingly, Katniss starts to smile.

"Shocked. Terrified. Uh, ridiculous, some of them. One man tripped backward into a bowl of punch." Everyone starts laughing. Even Effie is smiling.

"Well, it serves them right. It's their job to pay attention to you. And just because you come from District Twelve is no excuse to ignore you." Effie looks a little shocked. As if she's surprised at herself for saying this. "I'm sorry, but that's what I think,"

"I'll get a very bad score," says Katniss.

"Scores only matter if they're good, no one pays much attention to the bad or mediocre ones. For all they know, you could be hiding your talents to get a low score on purpose. People use that strategy." says Portia reassuringly.

"I hope that's how people will interpret the four I'll get," I say. "If that. Really, is anything less impressive than watching a person pick up a ball and throw it a couple of yards. One almost landed on my foot." Katniss grins at me and dunks a piece of pork in her mashed potatoes before eating it. It makes me feel good to see her smile. Once we get into the arena, I may never see her smile again. The thought depresses me.

After we're finished eating, we head to another room to see the training scores on television. When Rue comes on the screen, I am surprised to see she gets a seven. I wonder what she did in her private session. Then my picture comes up on the screen. I got an eight! I guess I did better than I thought. Last up comes Katniss' picture. I brace myself for the worst. I know she's better than what they will give her credit for.

Eleven! She gets an eleven! Effie is squealing like a pig and everyone is cheering for Katniss. I can't help but be happy for her, of course.

"There must be a mistake. How… how could that happen?" Katniss asks Haymitch.

"Guess they liked your temper," he says. "They've got a show to put on. They need some players with some heat."

"Katniss, the girl who was on fire," says Cinna, giving Katniss a hug. "Oh, wait until you see you interview dress."

"More flames?" she asks.

"Of a sort," he says mysteriously.

I bump into Katniss on the way to my room.

"Congratulations, Katniss." I say, and I mean it.

"Congratulations… Peeta." She answers, not looking me in the eye.

I get it. She knows that even though we both got good scores, only one of us can live anyway. But I already know who that person is going to be. Katniss is going to win. So I wish she'd stop being so upset when she's around me. She hurries off to her room and I sigh. I head back to my room too. It's getting late anyway.

I try to fall asleep, but I'm having trouble with it. I'm trying to think of a plan. A plan on how to make sure Katniss wins the Games. If anyone deserves to live to see home again, it's her. Sure, I'll miss my brothers and my father. But, not only is she the main food source for her family, and she has a life back home, whereas I don't really have anything. I could never live with myself back home knowing she didn't make it.

For ten years, she's been all I could think about. The one I stared at during school. The one I thought about while I was at the bakery. The one Mitch teased me about. The one Delly always helped me with, and the one she and I talked about. The one I tried to get over being nervous around so I could finally talk to her. She's the only one I blush around, the only one I'm speechless around. Having a crush on Katniss has always been my only, yet deepest secret.

Besides my brothers, and father sometimes, she's the only one I really care about. She's the only one that makes it worth it to get up every day and got to school. I can't even bear the thought of having to go back home and have her not be there. She's always been there. From the first day of kindergarten to now. She's always been there. She might not have noticed me at all, but according to what she knows about me, she's been paying more attention to me than I thought.

As I think about this, I realize something. Even if she survives and I die, in a matter of days I'm never going to see her again. I'll never see her walking home from school with Prim. Never see her, well more like stare at her, during school…. And I also realize something else. I don't just like Katniss, I love her.

There, I said it. I love Katniss Everdeen.

The next morning, I got ready and headed to the dining room before Katniss work up. Haymitch was already there.

"So, Peeta. You're going to follow through with our little interview plan, aren't you?'

I had almost forgotten about that.

"Oh, um… Well, I guess if it will keep her alive. Then I have to. For Katniss." I say. I'm not too embarrassed talking about it around Haymitch anymore, since he makes fun of me for it no matter what I do.

"Well, I have another way to help keep her alive." He says.

"What? What is it? Tell me!" I exclaim. Not much can be worse than admitting my love for her on live television.

"You team up with the career pack. Lead them away from her. Give her time to survive. Once they're out of the picture, you can join up with her and try to protect her. Supposing she doesn't kill you first." Oh, goody. Let's now put _that _thought in my head.

"If you think it will work." I answer.

"It will. Oh, and more thing." He continues. "You will have to coach separately from now on. If you want to train for your interview without her knowing your plan."

She can't know my plan. She wouldn't approve of it. As much as she needs to live, she would never want to owe me more than she already thinks she does.

"Oh. Well, okay then." I say.

Just then, Katniss walks through the door with a heaping plate of lamb and plum stew on wild rice. She's halfway through her breakfast before she says anything.

"So, what's going on? You're coaching us on interviews today, right?"

"That's right," says Haymitch.

"You don't have to wait until I'm done. I can listen and eat at the same time," Katniss replies.

"Well, there's been a change of plans. About our current approach,"

"What's that?" she asks.

Oh great. Here it comes.

"Peeta has asked to be coached separately." He says shrugging.

Oh, why, oh, why, did he have to put it like that. The look on Katniss' face is beyond surprise, it's pure betrayal. I feel horrible. To have there be betrayal, there would have to have been trust. If Katniss feels betrayed, then that means she trusted me. Oh, now I feel even worse. I'm just about to apologize to her when takes a breath and wipes the look from her face.

"Good," she says. "So what's the schedule?"

There she goes again. Trying to pretend she doesn't have emotions. Trying to be strong. And I hate myself for it.

"You'll each have four hours for Effie for presentation and four with me for content," says Haymitch. "You start with Effie, Katniss."

Katniss finishes eating and heads off to another room with Effie.

"That was horrible." I tell Haymitch.

"Yes," he agrees. "She did seem upset, didn't she."

"Did you see the look on her face?" I ask Haymitch. "I betrayed her." I look down at the table.

"She obviously cares for you, Peeta. Otherwise she wouldn't have minded one bit."

Even though I'm used to talking to Haymitch about it, this statement makes me blush. Haymitch smiles and pats me on the shoulder.

"Now, shall we get started?" he asks me. I nod.

"First off." He starts. "You will have to find a way to tell Caesar what you need to tell him, while making it sound true. The audience can't think you're making it up just to get sponsors."

"But it _is _true!" I answer.

"Yes, I know that. But they don't. We need to make it so real, so heartwarming, the audience will have no choice but to believe you." Haymitch continues slowly.

"Heartwarming. I've liked a girl for ten years who will never like me back. Now we're going into the arena where we will be forced to kill other boys and girls, as well as each other. Yeah, very heartwarming." I say with a scowl.

"Look," says Haymitch. "Just tell it how it is. The good parts of it. When did you first know you liked her?"

"Um, kindergarten."

"Wow."

"Yeah. I know."

"And why did you like her?" he asks, grilling for more information that I am not eager to share.

"Look, Haymitch. I'm not going to be pouring my heart out to the audience. I just want to get it over with." I answer, already exhausted from the whole thing. Haymitch looks at me expectantly. I sigh.

"The teacher asked for a volunteer to sing the valley song. Her hand shot straight up. When she sang, all of the birds outside stopped to listen. Just like when her father sang. Since then, I couldn't stop thinking about her." I say quietly.

I look down at the table, not wanting to look at Haymitch. When I finally do look up, Haymitch is looking at me in a way I've never seen him before. It's almost as if he's gone through the same thing.

"Just tell them the truth." He says softly. "Not all of it, but what you want them to know."

"And, if I don't want them to know anything at all?" I ask hopefully.

"Look, you don't even have to say her name if you don't want. Just let the audience know that you're not going down without a fight. That you're not going down without her."

The way he says this gives me new hope. I know I can do this. I don't even have to say her name. Just let them know who she is. Yeah, that should be easy. Not.

After I'm done with Haymitch, I move on to Effie. Four, tormenting hours of sitting up straight, smiling and talking as politely as possible. All while Effie stares me down like I'm in a test tube or something.

Finally, that's over. I then go to meet Portia and my other stylists. I try and stand still while they button, comb, tuck, pin, gel, stick, smooth, fasten and drape. After what seems like forever, I am allowed to look in the mirror.

I look… incredible. I am wearing a slick black suit with flame accents. My hair is combed back.

"Portia, I- I-" I stammer.

"Look amazing? No thanks necessary, love!" Portia finishes.

That isn't exactly what I was going to say, but close enough I guess.

Finally, we meet Katniss and Haymitch at the elevator. My jaw drops when I see Katniss.

She's wearing a long dress made with what looks like entirely out of gems and jewels. Each time she moves, I could've sworn she was surrounded by flames by the way the dress looks and hangs. There are flame designs on her nails, and she's wearing high heels. Which I _never _thought I'd see Katniss wear. Her hair is wrapped around her head, with strands of red in it, and then it drops into a long elegant braid on one side of her shoulder. She's sparkling. Literally. And her eyes. Her eyes are…. Amazing. Intelligent. Fierce. And beautiful all at the same time.

I'm pretty sure I would've stood there all day, staring at Katniss and feeling a little light headed. But a stern look from Haymitch snaps me back into reality.

Right as Katniss and I are making our way up to the waiting point on the stage, Haymitch jumps behind us. "Remember, you're still a happy pair. So act like it." He growls. Sure. Fine by me. I hope I don't blush while I'm on stage. But the way this is going already, I can almost guarantee it.

After a long time of watching other tributes do their interviews with Caesar, they call Katniss' name over the loudspeaker. She looks ready to pass out. Her palms are sweating and her face is pale. But I know she'll do just fine. Better than I'm probably going to be anyway.

"So, Katniss, the Capitol must be quite a change from District Twelve. What's impressed you most since you arrived here?" Caesar asks Katniss once she's made it onto the stage.

"The lamb stew," she says finally. I smile. It _was_ pretty good.

Caesar laughs. "The one with the dried plums?" Katniss nods. "Oh, I eat it by the bucketful. It doesn't show, does it?" Caesar replies with his hand on his stomach.

"Now, Katniss. When you came out in the opening ceremonies, my heart actually stopped. What did you think of that costume?" he asks. I know what he means by his heart almost stopping. That happened to me when I saw her to. But I guess that's a little different.

"You mean after I got over my fear of being burned alive?" Katniss asks. Caesar and the whole crowd laugh. I laugh too, because it's true.

"Yes. Start then," says Caesar.

"I thought Cinna was brilliant and it was the most gorgeous costume I'd ever seen and I couldn't believe I was wearing it. I can't believe I'm wearing this, either." Katniss lifts up her skirt to show it to the audience. "I mean, look at it!" She's got the audience cheering like crazy. Even if I didn't know her like I do, I would definitely sponsor her.

Katniss twirls in a circle once, making the crowd cheer.

"Oh, do that again!" says Caesar. Katniss lifts her skirt slightly and begins spinning across the stage. The crowd goes wild. With the dress billowing out around her I could've sworn she was being consumed in flames. She looks incredible. Finally, she stops and clutches Caesars arm to keep her from falling over.

"Don't stop!" he says.

"I have to, I'm dizzy!" Katniss squeals, giggling. I don't think she's ever done that, but it's adorable. Haymitch playfully bumps me on the shoulder when he sees her.

"Oh, cut it out." I reply, bumping him back. But I'm still smiling.

Caesar put his arm around Katniss to keep her from tumbling off the stage. "Don't worry, I've got you. Can't have you following in your mentor's footsteps." The crowd screams with laughter. I laugh and think that it serves Haymitch right for teasing me about Katniss.

"It's all right," says Caesar. "She's safe with me. So, how about that training score. E-le-ven. Give us a hint what happened in there."

Katniss looks around, and then bites her lip. "Um… all I can say, is I think it was a first." The camera switches to the Gamemakers who are snickering and nodding assent.

"You're killing us. Details. Details." Caesar encourage.

Katniss looks at the Gamemakers and says, "I'm not supposed to talk about it, right?"

"She's not!" one of the Gamemakers shouts in response.

"Thank you," says Katniss. "Sorry. My lips are sealed."

"Let's go back then, to the moment they called your sister's name at the reaping," Caesar moves on. "And you volunteered. Can you tell us about her?" a look of doubt crosses her face. I know they've just crossed a sensitive subject.

"Her name's Prim. She's just twelve. And I love her more than anything." The City Circle is completely silent now. I wonder if anyone else can hear my heart beating.

"What did she say to you? After the reaping?" Caesar asks.

"She asked me to try really hard to win." says Katniss.

"And what did you say?"

Katniss' hard look returns. "I swore I would."

Any doubt in my mind about letting Katniss win was erased immediately. I had never felt more strongly about anything before. She had to win. She would win.

"I bet you did," says Caesar. Then the buzzer goes off, signaling that Katniss' interview was over. "Sorry we're out of time. Best of luck, Katniss Everdeen, tribute from District Twelve."

Even after she's taken her seat, the crowd still cheers for Katniss. Then it's my turn. I take a deep breath and look at Haymitch before climbing onto the stage. He smiles and nods. I take my seat next to Caesar.

"Peeta Mellark," Caesar exclaims, shaking my hand. "So, Peeta. What's the first thing you noticed when you got here and started meeting your opponents?" I rack my brain, trying to think of something interesting to say. Likeable. That's my angle.

"The bread!" I exclaim. "The tributes compared to the bread from their district!" I remember noticing how tiny Rue resembles the dark, smooth bread from District Eleven.

"Really? How so?" asks Caesar. I go on to explain how each tribute compares to their bread until Caesar finally finds a way to change the subject.

"So what do you think about all the high tech gadgets here in the Capitol? Must be a switch from District Twelve, eh?" Gadgets. I haven't really used any of their "gadgets" except for…

"The showers!" I shout. "I know I'm hitting the wrong buttons! Tell me, do I still smell like roses?" I lift my arms jokingly and Caesar leans in to take a sniff.

"No," he decides. "But I have the same problem! I just know I still have lemon juice somewhere on me!" he exclaims. The crowd bursts into laughter. I sniff his underarms on cue.

"Hmm, I don't know." I say.

"So," Caesar says when the crowd has recovered from laughing. "Do you have a girlfriend back home?" I hesitate, then shake my head. "Handsome lad like you. There must be some special girl. Come on, what's her name?" Special girl. I look at Haymitch, who's staring at me. Waiting for an answer.

I sigh. "Well, there is this one girl. I've had a crush on her ever since I can remember. But I'm pretty sure she didn't know I was alive until the reaping." I hear sounds of sympathy coming from the crowd. I quickly glance at Katniss. She seems intrigued by this question, she wants an answer too.

"She have another fellow?" asks Caesar. I immediately think of Gale. But he's not exactly her "fellow"…. Yet.

"I don't know, but a lot of boys like her," I say. It's true, a lot do, and it's always made me slightly jealous.

"So, here's what you do. You win, you go home. She can't turn you down then, eh?" says Caesar encouragingly.

"I don't think it's going to work out. Winning… won't help in my case." I say, and I can already feel the blush rising on my face. I'll have to tell him now. There's no going back. All of Panem will know how I feel about Katniss.

"Why ever not?" Caesar asks, truly perplexed.

I can't do it. "Because…" But, I have to do it. "Because…" Oh, just spit it out already! "She came here with me." I get out. My face feels hot. I look down, but I can still feel those piercing gray eyes on my head. Why did she have to find out this way? Why couldn't I have just gone on, admiring her from afar forever?

"Oh, that is a piece of bad luck," says Caesar. I still can't look up. I know my face is beet red.

"It's not good," I agree, and I'm surprised I can even speak. I wonder what my family and friends are thinking back home. Delly will feel sorry for me. My father won't be too surprised. My brothers… will either be feeling bad for me or teasing me. And my mother will be horrified. Prim probably guessed already I bet. Even though she's only twelve, she can easily read people.

"Well, I don't think any of us can blame you. It'd be hard not to fall for that young lady," says Caesar. Tell me about it. I fell for her when we were five. Since then, I've just been trying to survive it without making a fool of myself every minute I'm near her. "She didn't know?" asks Caesar.

"Not until now," I answer quietly. I wonder what she's thinking right now. Is she mad at me?

"Wouldn't you love to pull her back out here and get a response?" asks Caesar excitedly, while the crowd screams assent. No, that's the last thing on earth I want right now. I don't know how I'll ever face her again. "Sadly, rules are rules, and Katniss Everdeen's time has been spent. Well, best of luck to you, Peeta Mellark, and I think I speak for all of Panem when I say our hearts go with yours."

The crowd is screaming so loud I'm not sure I'll ever hear again. "Thank you," I choke before crawling back to my seat. I risk taking a tiny peek up at the screens. Every single one is covered by Katniss and I, sitting only but a few tributes apart. My cheeks are so red I look like a strawberry. This is my worst nightmare come to life.

When the anthem plays, we all head back to our elevators. Katniss purposely heads to a car that does not contain me. Before I make it to my car, I bump into Cato from District One.

"Nice going Lover Boy, way to lie for the sponsors." he says with a grin. Of course, he thinks I was lying about Katniss just to get sponsors.

"Yeah," I reply. "I thought that would get their attention."

"So, you want to be in the career group?" he asks suddenly.

"Um, yeah." I answer, sounding pretty stupid

"Our first target. Katniss. You in?" Cato asks. I can do this. I have to, for Katniss.

"Sure thing," I say.

"Welcome to the team." Cato replies. I hurry into a car with Haymitch.

As soon as I'm in, I bury my face in my hands. My face is still burning from the interview.

"You did good, kid." Says Haymitch, putting a hand on my shoulder. "But, she's not going to believe you."

"What?" I look up. "How can she not? How could I make something up like that?" he doesn't answer. My head stays in my hands until I step out of the elevator.

As soon as I'm out, I feel Katniss' hands on my chest, pushing me over. I lose my balance and crash into and urn. My hands are bleeding from the broken pieces.

"What was that for?" I ask in disbelief.

"You had no right! No right to go saying those things about me!" she was mad, but why?

Suddenly, the other elevator opens and Haymitch, Effie, Cinna and Portia all pour out.

"What's going on? Did you fall?" Effie exclaims.

"After she shoved me," I say as Effie and Cinna help me up.

Haymitch turns on Katniss, "Shoved him?"

"This was your idea, wasn't it? Turning me into some kind of fool in front of the entire country?" Katniss shouts.

"It was my idea," I lie, "Haymitch just helped me with it." No need to have her be mad at Haymitch. If she's mad at me, let her be mad.

"Yes, Haymitch is very helpful. To you!" she replies.

"You _are _ a fool," Haymitch decides. "Do you think he hurt you? That boy just gave you something you could never achieve on your own."

"He made me look weak!" she answers. So that's why she's mad. But Katniss is anything but weak. How could she think I would do that to her purposely.

"He made you look desirable!" Haymitch shouts. Like she needed any help with that. "And let's face it, you can use all the help you can get in that department. You were about as romantic as dirt until he said he wanted you. Now they all do." Oh, goody. Just what I wanted. More guys to compete with. Not that I ever really had much of a chance with her anyway… still. "You're all they're talking about. The star-crossed lovers from District Twelve!" Haymitch finishes. I start to blush again. Star-crossed lovers?

"But we're not star-crossed lovers!" says Katniss. She's right. We're not lovers. Just one lover here. Haymitch grabs her by the shoulders and pins her to the wall. This is not what I wanted to happen.

"Who cares? It's all just a big show." he growls. "It's all how you're perceived. The most I could say about you after your interview was that you were nice enough, although that in itself was a small miracle. Now I can say you're a heartbreaker. Oh, oh, oh, how the boys back home fall longingly at your feet. Which do you think will get you more sponsors?"

Katniss pushes Haymitch off of her. This is not how I wanted things to end up. I can't go into the arena tomorrow with her thinking I made it up. Now that I've told her, she needs to know that it's true.

Cinna puts his arm around Katniss. "He's right, Katniss."

"I should've been told, so I didn't look stupid." she says. Making her look stupid was the last thing I wanted to do. All I wanted was to get her sponsors, that's all.

"No, you're reaction was perfect. If you'd known, it wouldn't have read as real," says Portia.

"She's just worried about her boyfriend," I say, thinking of Gale, and immediately I wish I hadn't.

Katniss blushes. "I don't have a boyfriend." she insists.

"Whatever," I say. "But I bet he's smart enough to know a bluff when he sees it." It certainly was not a bluff, but I figure now's not the time to tell her I'm really in love with her. "Besides _you _didn't say you loved _me_. So what does it matter?" I say before I can stop myself.

I can see Katniss' anger fading. "After he said he loved me, did you think I could be in love with him, too?" she asks. I never really thought about that possibility. But obviously she wasn't even close.

"I did," Portia jumps in. "The way you avoided looking at the cameras, the blush." She had blushed? I didn't really think about the fact that it would be embarrassing to her as well as me. I wish I could've just told her privately, instead of humiliating both of us in front of the entire country. Or, you know, not told her at all.

"You're golden, sweetheart. You're going to have sponsors lined up around the block," says Haymitch.

Katniss looks embarrassed now. "I'm sorry I shoved you." She says.

I shrug. "Doesn't matter. Although it's technically illegal." And it really doesn't matter to me that she shoved me. As long as she's not mad at me anymore.

"And your hands okay?" she asks.

"They'll be all right," I answer.

Suddenly, I realize how hungry I am. "Come on, let's eat," says Haymitch. So we follow him into the dining room. I'm hungry, but my hands are bleeding too heavily to use a fork and knife. Portia takes me away for medical treatment.

When we get to the room, she starts to bandage my hands. "You were telling the truth," she decides.

"Yeah. I really was," I answer.

Portia looks at me with sympathy. "Are you glad she doesn't believe you, or do you wish she knew?"

I look down. "I wish none of this had ever happened. I wish I could've told her on my own time. But now that this has happened and all…. yeah, I wish she knew it was true."

Portia finishes bandaging my hands and says, "She'll figure it out. You're not going to let her die in the arena then, true?"

"Of course not. I don't care how mad she is at me. That doesn't change my feelings for her."

"Then she'll see." says Portia plainly. We walk back to the dining room to finish dinner.

After dinner, we watch a replay of the interviews. Katniss still looks amazing. I still act like a dope. I do notice, though, that Katniss does blush. If I didn't know any better, she could love me too.

But, unfortunately, I do know better.

When the anthem is over, I realize this is the last time I'll see these people all in one room. Tomorrow, Katniss and I will be sent into the arena, and only she will come out. Effie takes Katniss and me by the hands and starts to cry. She thanks us and kisses us on the cheek. Then she says, "I wouldn't be at all surprised if I finally get promoted to a decent district next year!" before hurrying out of the room.

Haymitch crosses his arm and stares at us.

"Any final words of advice?" I ask.

"When the gong sounds, get the hell out of there. You're neither of you up to the bloodbath at the cornucopia. Just clear out, put as much distance as possible between yourselves and the others, and find a source of water," he says. "Got it?"

"And after that?" asks Katniss.

"Stay alive," he says. We don't question him this time. Katniss heads off to her room, but I stay behind to talk to Portia.

"Portia," I sigh. "What am I going to do?" she knows what I mean. What am I going to do about Katniss? "She needs to know the truth before I die." I say.

Portia smiles at me. "So tell her," she says.

"It's not that simple." I answer.

"Why not? Tell her you love her, it's as simple as that," she says.

"Right, I'm just going to walk up to her while she's fighting me and tell her I love her. That would never work. She wouldn't believe me anyway." I say defiantly.

"Well, then. If you can't tell her, show her. Actions speak louder than words, Peeta." She answers calmly.

I think about that. "Thanks Portia." I say, and head off to my own room.

I can't sleep. No matter how hard I try, I can't seem to keep my eyes shut. So I sneak out of my bed and head up to the roof. I sit there quietly for a while. Alone. Watching the city. Then I hear her.

"You should be getting some sleep." She says.

I shake my head, not even turning to look at her. "I didn't want to miss the party. It's for us, after all." I say.

Katniss comes up beside me and looks down at the people dancing below. "Are they in costumes?" she asks.

"Who could tell?" I answer. "With all the crazy clothes they wear here. Couldn't sleep, either?"

"Couldn't turn my mind off," she says.

"Thinking about your family?" I ask.

"No," she admits. "All I can do is wonder about tomorrow. Which is pointless, of course." Katniss looks at me. "I really am sorry about your hands." She says.

"It doesn't matter, Katniss," I say. "I've never been a contender in these Games anyway."

"That's no way to be thinking," she says.

"Why not? It's true. My best hope is to not disgrace myself and…" I hesitate.

"And what?" says Katniss.

"I don't know how to say it exactly. Only… I want to die as myself. Does that make any sense?" I ask. Katniss shakes her head. "I don't want them to change me in there. Turn me into some kind of monster that I'm not."

"Do you mean you won't kill anyone?" she asks.

"No, when the time comes, I'm sure I'll kill just like everybody else. I can't go down without a fight." (without fighting for Katniss, anyway.) "Only I keep wishing I could think of a way to… to show the Capitol they don't own me. That I'm more than just a piece in their Games," I say.

"But you're not," Katniss says. "None of us are. That's how the Games work."

"Okay, but within that framework, there's still you, there's still me," I insist. "Don't you see?"

"A little. Only… no offense, but who cares, Peeta?" she says. I know she hadn't intended to hurt me with that comment. But I'm frustrated that I can't make her understand.

"I do. I mean, what else am I allowed to care about at this point?" Well, besides her. But I'm not going to tell her that right now. I stare into her big gray eyes, searching for an answer somewhere inside her.

"Care about what Haymitch said. About staying alive." She says. Right, and how am I supposed to that while keeping her alive?

I smile sadly at her. "Okay. Thanks for the tip, sweetheart." I mock Haymitch.

Katniss shakes her head at me. "Look, if you want to spend the last hours of your life planning some noble death in the arena, that's your choice. I want to spend mine in District Twelve."

"Wouldn't surprise me if you do," I say. Why shouldn't she want that? "Give my mother my best when you make it back, will you?"

"Count on it," she says. Then turns and leaves the roof.

Here I sit. By myself again. I think about what Katniss said. Of course she would want to spend her life in District Twelve, she has more of a life there than me. She deserves to go home.

Finally, I go back to bed.

The next morning, I don't see Katniss. Which is too bad, considering the next time I see her she'll probably be trying to kill me.

Portia finds me and lays out a simple outfit for me to wear. I will be dressed and readied for the arena once we get there. We climb to the roof and wait for the hovercraft to pick us up. I wonder where we will be going, where the arena is this time around. We eat breakfast in silence on the hovercraft.

When we are let off of the hovercraft, the ladder takes us down deep into the ground. We're headed underneath the arena. Finally, we are in a chamber to be prepared for the Games. Portia helps me dress in simple brown pants, a green undershirt, a thin black jacket and tall brown boots that come up over thin yet warm socks.

Portia and I sit on a couch in the chamber, waiting for my call to be released into the games.

"Have you found a way to show her?" Portia asks. This is the first thing she's said since we've been down here. I think she's a little obsessed with the whole star-crossed lovers thing.

"No," I answer. "But I will," And I honestly will. The thought of never seeing Katniss again without her truly knowing how I feel unsettles me.

Finally, a woman comes in and tells me that I will be sent into the arena now. Portia kisses me on the cheek. "Good luck, Peeta. With everything." She winks at me as I am being closed off from her in a glass tube. The tube shoots upward, and I'm in complete darkness. I close my eyes and wait.

When I open my eyes again, I'm being raised up through the ground. Bright sun hits my eyes and I squint. Standing around me are the twenty three other tributes. Then I hear the voice over the loudspeaker, "Ladies and gentlemen, let the Seventy-fourth Hunger Games begin!"

One whole minute we must stand in silence, until we are released from our platforms. In the Cornucopia in front of us are things we would need to survive. Water bottles, food, blankets, weapons. Unfortunately, we have been instructed to get as far away from the Cornucopia as possible as soon as the gong sounds.

Then I see Katniss. She's standing only but five tributes away from me. She's looking at something, a bow and arrow. She will try to get it, I know she will. But if she does, she could be killed right here and now. Suddenly, she meets my eyes. I shake my head, desperately trying to tell her not to go.

The gong sounds. Katniss looks confused, but she doesn't go for the bow. Instead, she grabs a sheet of plastic and a loaf of bread. Then she runs for a bright orange backpack. Another boy is headed for it too. I desperately try and get there before he does so he doesn't have the chance to kill her.

As I'm looking at them, running towards Katniss, I see a knife lodge in the boys back. Who threw it, I don't know. The boy coughs blood all over Katniss' face. Oh, gross. Then he collapses, leaving Katniss the backpack.

Relief spreads through me as Katniss darts for the wood. She's faster than anyone I know, she can make it. But then I see Clove, from District Two, pulling a knife out of her belt. No! She throws the knife and misses Katniss' head by an inch, and instead lodging itself into Katniss' backpack. Katniss slings the pack over both shoulders and races off into the woods.

No one has attacked me yet, and everyone seems to be busy fighting someone else. The only one who notices me is Cato, and he and I are allies now. I run to the Cornucopia and grab the bow and arrows, planning to give it to Katniss when I find her.

I turn around and find myself face-to-face with a boy. I don't know what district he's from, but he doesn't look happy to see me. He stabs my arm before I can react. I collapse to the ground, wailing in pain. I'm almost sure the boy is about to kill me, but then Cato throws a spear at him, and he dies right before my eyes.

I slowly stand up and find a bandage in one of the other packs. I wrap it around my arm. I then quickly grab what I think could use, before joining the Careers on the other side of the Cornucopia.

"Ah, there you are, Lover Boy." says Cato. Great, looks like that nick name's going to stick.

"Cato," I answer. Then I take a good look at the other tributes. There's Clove, the other tribute from District Two. One girl from District Four, whom I don't know the name of. Then there's Glimmer and Marvel, from District One. Glimmer and Marvel don't look too vicious, mostly just "prettied up" for the cameras. But I have a feeling they can be pretty violent when they want to.

"You know who our target is, right Lover Boy?" asks Clove. I do. I know exactly who they're headed for. And I'm here to make sure they never find her.

"Yes. Katniss, right?" I say. Clove nods.

"And you're going to help us find her, got it?" Glimmer takes the bow and arrows right out of my hands and grins wickedly at me. I gulp, and then nod. At best I can hold them off until Katniss or Thresh kills them. Once the Careers find what they need, we head off into the woods, the exact side that Katniss went into.

We've been walking through the woods for about five hours now. We've taken breaks, of course, but I still feel like my legs will fall off any second.

"Let's rest here," Cato orders. We all sit and begin to go through our packs. I have some bread, a little more bandage, and a small bottle of water. I drink some of the water and snack on a tiny piece of bread.

Soon, Cato decides that it's time to get moving again.

By the time we rest again, it's cold and dark. I now have a black eye, and I'm limping because I went to fill up my water bottle and when I came back Clove thought I was an intruder. Needless to say, I got pretty beat up.

Finally, we're approaching a tree, when suddenly we see someone has lit a fire at the top of it.

"Let's go!" Cato shouts, and we begin running towards it to take down whoever was up there.

_Please, please don't let it be Katniss! _I pray. But she is much too bright to be doing something like this. She knows that the Careers will be out to get her. I can only see in the dim light that it's a girl. Cato begins to beat her up, and I can't watch. The girl cries out in pain and pleads with us to let her go. That's when Cato stabs her with a knife. The sound is sickening, and I hope to get away from the tree as quickly as possible.

"Better clear out so they can get the body before it starts stinking." Says Cato. So we walk about fifteen yards from the tree and stop in a clearing.

"Shouldn't we have heard a cannon by now?" asks Clove.

"I'd say yes. Nothing to prevent them from going in immediately." answers Glimmer.

"Unless she isn't dead." someone says.

"She's dead. I stuck her myself." Insists Cato.

"Then where's the cannon?"

"Someone should go back. Make sure the job's done."

"Yeah, we don't want to have to track her down twice."

"I said she's dead!" shouts Cato.

They continue arguing until I say, "We're wasting time! I'll go finish her and let's move on!"

"Go on, then, Lover Boy," says Cato. "See for yourself."

I leave the others and head back to the tree. Sure enough, the girl is still alive. Barely, but still breathing. I don't know who it is, but I still feel horrible. I'm really bad at watching people suffer.

"I'm so sorry," I whisper to the girl. She grips my hand, silently pleading with me to finish the job. She doesn't want to suffer anymore. I close my eyes and bring the knife down on her chest. The girl stops breathing.

I return to the Careers. "Was she dead?" asks Cato.

"No. but she is now," I say as the cannon fires.

We make a camp about an hour away. As soon as the sun rises, we head off once again. We walk for about three hours before stopping to rest again. "So, Lover Boy," says Cato. "Any idea how Katniss got that eleven?" I hesitate. Surely I can't tell them, they'll find her for sure.

"No idea," I lie. "But, I wish I knew." Cato studies me for a minute, trying to decide whether or not I'm lying. Eventually, he decides to believe me. We begin to walk again.

I wonder where Katniss is at this moment. Is she all right? Of course she is. Katniss is very capable of taking care of herself. I bet she's eating fresh game right now. Maybe she's found some edible plants, too. I drink a little more water. I can't take my mind off of Katniss. I hope Haymitch has gotten some sponsors for her. Surely she must have some. I wonder if they've sent her anything yet.

We walk four more hours before I realize something's wrong. It's dark now, and I smell smoke. Cato must realize too, because he orders everyone to stop. My eyes begin to sting, there's smoke coming from somewhere. But where? Slowly, we turn around. Every tree, every bush, everything is on fire.

"Run!" shouts Glimmer. We all scramble in different directions. Trying to find some source of water to protect us from the raging forest fire. Surely this is a plan of the Gamemakers. They're doing this to lure us into some kind of trap. A trap where we will find other tributes. The Capitol refuses to let a day pass without some sort of bloodbath.

Smoke begins to fill my lungs, and I'm finding it harder and harder to breath. Suddenly the bottom of my pants catches on fire. By the time I've distinguished it, it's become painful to breath. I run towards Cato and the others. Hoping they've found some source of water. Fire balls come crashing out of the sky. I dodge to avoid coming in contact with one, as they destroy everything they touch.

I try, but I can't seem to find the Careers. I collapse on the ground as the smoke and heat take over my body. When suddenly, I remember that Katniss probably isn't too far away. Fear takes over. Is she in the midst of the raging fire? If the Gamemakers are trying to bring us together, now would be a good time for her to come walking through the trees. I'm obviously not near the Careers anyway, so she would be safe enough. We could form an alliance. Haymitch said to team up with the Careers only until I found Katniss.

All hopes of my finding her are crushed when Cato and the rest of the Careers come scrambling through the trees. "Water!" Cato shouts, and begins running the opposite direction of me. I quickly force myself into standing and follow them off back into the woods.

Sure enough, we find a pond. I'm relieved, and begin to drink. Until I realize that's not all we've found. Fear, dread, and anxiety take over my body and my stomach starts to hurt as I see Katniss in a tree above us. Cato sees her too.

Surprisingly, Katniss smiles. "How's everything with you?" she calls down cheerfully.

"Well enough," says Cato. "Yourself?"

"It's been a bit warm for my taste," Katniss answers. I'm a little impressed at how clever that remark was. "The air's better up here. Why don't you come on up?" she says from her tree. No Katniss! What are you doing? How will I protect her now? I can't fight off all the careers at once, and surely none of them will side with me if I announce I want to save Katniss. Then I realize why she called Cato up. Every one of the Careers is much too big and heavy to get as high as she did. Once again, Katniss has outsmarted me.

"Think I will," says Cato.

"Here, take this, Cato," says Glimmer, holding out the bow and arrows to Cato. I polish my knife with my shirt, trying to avoid looking at Katniss. She must think I'm a traitor. If only she knew the real reason I teamed up with the Careers.

"No," Cato says, refusing the bow. "I'll do better with my sword." he begins to climb the tree, but when he's about seven feet up, the branch breaks. Cato falls to the ground, and I'm hoping he's broken something, but he stands right up, swearing like a fiend.

Glimmer then begins to climb, but stops immediately when she hears the branches cracking beneath her. She tries to shoot Katniss with the bow, but Katniss is much too high. Plus, Glimmer has no idea how to use the thing.

The Careers begin to discuss their next plan of attack. When I say, "Oh, let her stay up there. It's not like she's going anywhere. We'll deal with her in the morning." I still won't look at Katniss. The Careers agree with me and we head to the base of the next tree to set up camp. I don't sleep for a few hours though. I'm too busy watching Katniss sleep. I know, it's a little creepy, but I can't help myself. I bet the audience is having lots of fun watching as I stare at her. They must know by now, if they ever had doubts, that I was telling the complete truth in my interview. Finally, I fall asleep.

I wake to the sound of millions of bees. No, wasps. Tracker jackers! I quickly jump up and grab my things. Cato and the others are already awake. "To the lake! To the lake!" he shouts, and I begin to run. I know this is the doing of Katniss. I know she sawed the branch to set the Tracker jackers on us, and I know she doesn't care if I die along with the others. I betrayed her.

As I run, I notice that Glimmer and the girl from District Four got left behind. Oh well. Maybe Katniss will get her bow now. Katniss! Even though she doesn't care if I die, I certainly care if she does. As soon as Cato, Clove, and Marvel aren't looking, I dash back the way we came. Hoping to find Katniss gone.

I burst through the clearing to find Katniss kneeling next to a disgusting-looking Glimmer, she's trying to free the bow from her swollen hands. "What are you still doing here?" I hiss. She looks up at me in surprise. I think she expected me to kill her, what with the bow in my hand in all, but I would never do such a thing. "Are you mad?" I shout, prodding her with the end of the spear, urging her to stand. "Get up! Get up!" I cry. Katniss stands. I shove her away from me as hard as I can, just as Cato comes bursting through the trees. He is beyond angry. "Run!" I scream at her. "Run!"

The last thing I remember before blacking out is Cato stabbing me in the thigh. My leg is on fire and I collapse to the ground. Eventually, Cato runs off, thinking I'm dead. But the only thing I can do is lie on the ground. Praying that Katniss got away.

The next two days are pure agony. With the gash on my leg and the Tracker jacker hallucinations. I feel like I could die right now and it would be much less painful than those hallucinations. I didn't know there were so many ways for someone to die, but I watch Katniss die in every way possible while I'm infused with the tracker jacker's venom. I know none of these things I'm seeing can be true, but the images will haunt me forever.

When I've finally come to, my leg is burning with pain. I try to stand, and find out quickly that it's no use. So I just lie here for a while. Soon, I realize I'm going to have to move. The Careers will find me pretty quickly if I don't get going. I slowly pull myself up and begin to half-limp half-crawl away from my spot. I don't know where I'm going, I just need to get as far away as possible.

Finally, I find a river. I know if I get in, I will never be able to pull myself back out. So instead, I lay on the ground near it and began to camouflage myself. Maybe, if I cover myself well enough, I can die here by the pond. It would be much better than being killed by Cato, anyway. When I'm done covering myself with leaves, mud and dirt, I drift into a long sleep.

I quickly awake to the sound of an explosion. What could have caused that? Somehow, I know that Katniss was a part of it. What I don't know, is whether she was hurt or not. But I don't hear cannon, so I assume she's still alive. As much as my leg hurts, it takes me a while to fall back to sleep. But when I do, I am not confident that I will ever wake up again.

When I do, I wake to another sound. This time it's Claudius Templesmith's voice, booming over the loudspeaker. I only catch a few words, because I'm so tired wounded, but the words I do hear make no sense. Rule change. Victors. District. Two winners… Two winners? Two winners! There can be two victors if they are from the same district! Katniss. Now Katniss and I could both win! If only I could find her. I want to try to stand, but I know that's impossible. I fall asleep once more. But this time, I know I'll wake up. I have to. For Katniss. And for me. For both of us, together. Together, we can win.

"Peeta! Peeta!" she whispers. I smile. Could it be her? Has Katniss really come to find me? I carefully open my eyes, sure it must be a dream. But, it's not. There she is, looking good even. And she's looking for me.

"You here to finish me off, sweetheart?" I mimic Haymitch. Hoping she'll here my weak voice.

"Peeta?" she whispers again. "Where are you?" she's almost on top of me now.

"Well, don't step on me." I say. Katniss jumps back. I open my eyes. She gasps, and I laugh.

"Close your eyes again," she says. I do. It's such a relief to have her here. I open my eyes and Katniss is kneeling beside me. "I guess all those hours decorating cakes paid off."

I smile at her. "Yes, frosting. The final defense of the dying."

"You're not going to die." Katniss answers.

"Says who?" I say, my eyes still closed.

"Says me. We're on the same team now, you know," she tells me.

I open my eyes. "So, I heard. Nice of you to find what's left of me." I try to sound casual, but on the inside I'm ecstatic. Katniss is here. She must've heard I was injured. She could've left me to die, and it would've been a lot easier. But she came.

"Did Cato cut you?' she asks me, giving me a drink from her water bottle. So, she has heard.

"Left leg. Up high." I answer.

"Let's get you into the stream, wash you off so I can see what kind of wounds you've got," says Katniss. What I do next is something I would never have had the courage to do before.

I say, "Lean down a minute first. Need to tell you something." Katniss turns and puts her ear to my lips. "Remember," I whisper, "We're madly in love, so it's all right to kiss me any time you feel like it." Translation: I'm madly in love with you. Please kiss me right now.

Of course, she doesn't. Instead, she jerks her head back laughing. And even though she didn't get the message, it's still nice to hear her laugh. "Thanks, I'll keep it in mind." she says. Yeah, right.

Katniss tries to help me into the stream, but it's no use. I can't move a muscle. She tries to drag me, and sharp cries of pain escape me. It's all I can do to not scream in agony. Finally, when Katniss realizes how much I'm buried into the ground, she gives me one final tug to release me from their grasp. I don't even have the strength to be embarrassed over the tears that are now running down my cheeks.

"Look, Peeta, I'm going to roll you into the stream. It's very shallow here, okay?" says Katniss.

"Excellent," I say, gritting my teeth and trying not to cry. Katniss crouches down beside me.

"On three," she says. "One, two, three!" she starts to roll me towards the river. She stops after only one roll, because I'm crying out in pain.

"Okay, change of plans. I'm not going to put you all the way in," says Katniss.

"No more rolling?" I ask hopefully.

"That's all done. Let's get you cleaned up. Keep an eye on the woods for me, okay?" I nod, because that's all I really can do. Katniss looks at me for a moment. She hesitates, which confuses me, but then she begins to pour water over me. Cleaning the mud and dried leaves off of me. Finally, she finds my clothes. She unzips my jacket and unbuttons my shirt. She carefully pulls those off, and cuts my undershirt off of me. Okay, I'm sitting here, alone with Katniss, wearing no shirt. Nothing to be nervous about, right? Maybe not, but that doesn't keep me from blushing. Luckily, it's too dark for Katniss to notice… Hopefully.

Once she's removed most of the leaves and mud, Katniss begins to wash the dirt and grime from my hair and face. As soon as Katniss' gentle hands meet the hot skin of my cheeks, they become even hotter from blushing. But if she notices, she doesn't say anything.

Katniss then begins to dig the tracker jacker stings out of their swollen lumps. I wince, but refrain from doing anything but. Then she chews some green leaves into a big wad, and spits them into her hand. I think this is a little odd, until she puts the leaves on the stings and it applies immediate relief. Katniss leaves me to dry in the sun while she washes my shirts in the river. So I just sit and stare at her. I'm still in shock that she's even here. But more like the I-won-a-million-dollars type of shock. When Katniss is done, she kneels back beside me and pulls out a small pot from her backpack. Inside the pot is a smooth white cream. Katniss starts to rub the cream onto my chest, and I realize it must be burn medicine.

"Swallow these," she says, handing me two pills. I swallow them, and can feel my temperature already starting to drop. "You must be hungry."

"Not really." I answer. "It's funny, I haven't been hungry for days," When Katniss offers me a piece of cooked bird, I turn away. I can already feel my stomach beginning to churn at the thought of it.

"Peeta, we need to get some food in you," Katniss insists.

"It'll just come right back up," I tell her. Finally, being Katniss, she got me to eat a few pieces of dried apple. At the state I'm in, she could probably get me to do anything. Anything but walk, that is. "Thanks. I'm much better, really. Can I sleep now Katniss?" I ask hopefully. As much as I want to be awake right now, with Katniss, I don't have any energy to enjoy it.

"Soon, I need to look at your leg first." Oh yeah, that. Katniss gently pulls of my boots and socks. Then, she very slowly inches my pants off of me. Okay, now I'm sitting here with no shirt _and _no pants. Great.

I can see the horror in Katniss face as soon as she sees the wound. I'm sure it must be horrid, but I haven't the courage to look at it. "Pretty awful, huh?" I ask her, watching her closely.

"So-so." She shrugs, obviously trying to make me, and herself, feel better. "You should see some of the people they bring my other from the mines." I raise my eyebrows. From what I heard, she usually stays clear of the house when the burn victims are there. "First thing is to clean it well."

Katniss pours water over the wound, her face looking greener as it goes on. I feel a little sorry for her. She came all this way to find me, only to have to deal with this. Plus, it's a little odd having Katniss taking care of me, when really it was supposed to be the other way around. Though, I didn't say I didn't like it.

"Why don't we give it some air and then…" she trails off, and I realize she has no idea what she's doing.

"And then you'll patch it up?" I ask her, trying to be helpful.

"That's right," she answers. "In the meantime, you eat these." She says, pressing some dried pears into my hand. Katniss goes back into the river to wash my pants. Then returns to examine the first aid kit she apparently took from one of the careers.

"We're going to have to experiment some," she admits. Katniss chews more of the green leaves and presses them into the wound. Soon, I can feel pus running down the side of my leg.

"Katniss?" I say. I don't know what on earth I'm doing. Katniss meets my eyes. Before I can lose my courage I mouth, "How about that kiss?" Katniss bursts into laughter. Darn, I had seriously hoped she would give in this time. "Something wrong?" I ask, trying to sound completely innocent.

"I… I'm no good at this. I'm not my mother. I've no idea what I'm doing and I hate pus," she gets out between her laughter. "Euh!" she groans as she drains more pus. "Euuuh!"

"How do you hunt?" I ask.

"Trust me. Killing things is much easier than this," Katniss replies. "Although for all I know, I am killing you."

"Can you speed it up a little?" I ask, knowing I would be just fine to die right here, right now, with Katniss by my side. I won't last long anyway with this gash on my leg.

"No. Shut up and eat your pears," she says. I grin and eat the pears.

After lots of pus-draining, Katniss examines the wound closer. I can tell from her face that is hasn't gotten better.

"What's next, Dr. Everdeen?" I ask.

"Maybe I'll put some of the burn ointment on it. I think it helps with infection anyway. And wrap it up?" Katniss answers. Then, she pulls out another backpack from behind her. She hands it to me, and I don't know what she expects me to do with it, until she says, "Here, cover yourself with this and I'll wash your shorts."

It takes me a minute to realize what she means. She wants to wash my underwear. If that's not embarrassing, I don't know what is. I don't know what was going through my mind at that moment, but before I can stop myself, I say, "Oh, I don't care if you see me." I have no idea why I just said that. I do actually care if she sees me. I mean, I'm already nervous with no shirt on, let alone no pants _or _underwear!

"You're just like the rest of my family,' she says. "I care, all right?" and she turns towards the river. I quickly pull of my underwear, remembering that the whole world is watching, and cover myself with the backpack as I throw the underwear into the river near Katniss. She retrieves the shorts and begins to wash them in the current.

"You know, you're kind of squeamish for such a lethal person. I wish I'd let you give Haymitch a shower after all." I joke.

"What's he sent you so far?" she asks.

"Not a thing," I answer. And immediately I know she's been sent something. That was our deal after all; keep Katniss alive. I pause, not wanting her to know that I already knew. "Why, did you get something?" I ask, trying to sound surprised.

"Burn medicine," she says, and she looks almost embarrassed. I kind of regret sounding surprised now. "Oh, and some bread." Katniss says. I feel almost as if that was a sign from Haymitch saying; This bread is Peeta. Just like this bread, Peeta will protect you and keep you alive.

"I always knew you were his favorite," I say. It's true, she kind of is.

"Please, he can't stand being in the same room as me," says Katniss.

"Because you're just alike," I mutter, falling asleep. It's true, they are alike. Smart, thoughtful, strong… Except for the fact that Haymitch is a drunken idiot most of the time, whereas Katniss is a beautiful, clever girl.

I wake up to Katniss softly shaking my shoulder. "Peeta, we've got to go now." She whispers.

"Go? Go where?" I ask.

"Away from here. Downstream maybe. Somewhere we can hide you until you're stronger," she says. Katniss turns away again as I pull on my undershorts, but then helps me put on my pants and shirt. She leaves me barefoot so we can walk in the stream, though. Katniss tries to help me to my feet, but immediately my head feels dizzy and my stomach hurts and my leg feels like it's being crushed. "Come on. You can do this." She says softly.

I lean heavily on Katniss as she helps me limp along. We only make it about fifty yards before I have to stop. I sit on the bank and Katniss puts my head between my knees. I sit there trying to regain my focus as she awkwardly pats me on the back. Finally, when I'm able to stand, Katniss patiently helps me get to a small cave she's found.

Katniss covers the cave floor with pine needles and sets out her sleeping bag. She helps me climb in, and tucks the corners around my chin. She makes me take some pills, but I refuse to eat any food. Then she starts to conceal the cave mouth with leaves, and I just lie here and stare at her. She's so strong and brave to come looking for me. If I were her, I would've left me to die. She didn't even know that I had only teamed up with the Careers to protect her, she thought I'd betrayed her. So… why did she come back for me?

"Katniss," I call her quietly. She comes over and kneels beside me, brushing the hair out of my eyes. "Thanks for finding me."

"You would have found me if you could," Boy, is that true. I realize that now is the perfect time to explain everything to her. That I wasn't lying at the interview. That I was with the Careers to protect her. That I really do love her.

"Yes. Look, if I don't make it back-" I begin.

"Don't talk like that. I didn't drain all that pus for nothing," she says. She doesn't get what I'm trying to tell her.

"I know. But just in case I don't-" I try again.

"No, Peeta, I don't even want to discuss it," she says. She puts her fingers on my lips to quiet me. But I need to tell her this.

"But I-" I insist. I need to get this out before it's too late.

Katniss leans down and kisses me.

I stare at her, dumbfounded. Did that really just happen?

"You're not going to die. I forbid it. All right?" she says softly.

"All right," I whisper. Then I doze off.

Katniss kisses me awake. This startles me so much, I stare up at her. Then I smile. I would be happy to lie here gazing at her forever. Katniss holds a pot out for me to see. "Peeta, look what Haymitch has sent you."

It takes an hour for Katniss to finally get me to drink the broth. She tries coaxing me, begging me, threatening me. But the most effective approach is when she promises a kiss for every sip of broth I take. I empty the pot in the tiniest sips possible. Then she lets me fall back to sleep.

When I wake up again, Katniss is gone. I'm immediately worried and frightened. Did Cato and Clove get her? The thought is too unbearable. I frantically look and listen for her. I'm struggling to get p when she walks through the cave entrance. "I woke up and you were gone," I say. "I was worried about you." After all this, and I'm still able to blush around Katniss. Oh, the things she does to me.

Katniss laughs and eases me back down. "You were worried about me? Have you taken a look at yourself lately?"

"I thought Cato and Clove might have found you. They like to hunt at night," I tell her seriously.

"Clove? Which one is that?" she asks.

"The girl from District Two. She's still alive, right?" I say.

"Yes, there's just them and us and Thresh and Foxface," says Katniss. "That's what I nicknamed the girl from Five. How do you feel?"

"Better than yesterday. This is an enormous improvement over the mud. Clean clothes and medicine and a sleeping bag," I hesitate. "….and you."

Katniss reaches out to touch my cheek and I catch her hand, pressing it against my lips. I wish it didn't take being thrown into an arena to fight to the death to have the courage to tell Katniss how I feel. I remember Portia's last request from me; _ show her you love her. _ And no matter what it takes, I intend to do just that.

"No more kisses for you until you've eaten," says Katniss. I get more? I eagerly eat the berry mush she made for me, but refuse the bird again, which I found out she calls a groosling. Even if she did kiss me to make me eat it, I don't want to throw up on her afterwards.

"You didn't sleep," I notice, once I've done eating.

"I'm all right," she answers, but I can tell she's exhausted.

"Sleep now. I'll keep watch. I'll wake you if anything happens," I say. She hesitates. "Katniss, you can't stay up forever."

"All right," she decides. "But just for a few hours. Then you wake me." Katniss spreads out the sleeping bag. She lies down with one hand defensively on her loaded bow. I sit beside her, leaning against the wall.

"Go to sleep," I say softly. I brush the hair out of her face with my hand, and I keep stroking her hair until she falls asleep. Deep down, I know that most of this has been staged. That she's only pretending to love me for the cameras. But some part of me wants to believe that it's true. That maybe, she really does care for me. If she didn't at all, then there would be no reason to come find me. She was doing just fine without the whole star-crossed lovers thing. She could've won without having the trouble, no, the burden of me tagging along. So she must care for me somewhat… right?

I spend the next five hours watching Katniss sleep, daydreaming, doodling with my finger in the dirt. But mostly watching Katniss. Finally, she wakes up.

"Peeta, you were supposed to wake me after a couple of hours," she says.

"For what? Nothing's going on here," I tell her. "Besides I like watching you sleep. You don't scowl. Improves your look a lot."

Katniss scowls and I grin. She puts a hand on my cheek, and she must notice how hot I am. She stands over me and watches while I drink two quarts of water. Then I take of my shirt so she can tend to my minor wounds. I take off my pants, and she takes a deep breath before unwrapping my leg.

Katniss' face turns pale as she re-examines the wound. "Well, there's more swelling, but the pus is gone," she says in a shaky voice.

"I know what blood poisoning in, Katniss," I tell her. "Even if my mother isn't a healer."

"You're just going to have to outlast the other's, Peeta. They'll cure it back at the Capitol when we win," she says.

"Yes, that's a good plan," I try to reassure her, because I know she's doubtful as well. And I will make it. I'm not leaving Katniss. Not now. Not ever.

"You have to eat. Keep your strength up. I'm going to make you soup," says Katniss.

"Don't light a fire," I say. "It's not worth it."

"We'll see," she answers, walking away towards the stream.

I sigh and shake my head because she can be so stubborn sometimes. Of course, she is trying to cook for me, after all…. Whatever.

I sit in the cave while Katniss makes the soup. Feeling awful, miserable, useless. But most of all, tired. And not just physically, mentally, too. I'm tired of the fighting, tired of being watched every minute. And certainly tired of being a piece in their Games.


End file.
